never trust an honest dragon

so i found this dress that i so wanted for anime expo. i ordered it and sent my money, in january. well it's now the end of may, i need the dress by the end of june, and it's still not here. it was sent back to the honest dragon so i had to send her more money to resend it. well i did that and she put an address on the package that i haven't lived at in more than two years. i have no idea how she even got this address. so i contacted the post office and they said i have to pay and have my address changed. i did that when we moved from there, TWO YEARS BEFORE!!! why should i have to do it again. i don't understand why the post office can't intercept it and send it to a post office where i can pick it up. they told me that the sender has to contact them with the correct address!! WTF??? i don't get it. so i emailed the honest dragon again and she said to check for it after june 5th. i need it before the end of june....hello!!??
so i told her the post office said she has to contact them. i also told her if i don't get it when i need it then i want my money back. i can't keep sending her shipping money for something she intends for me to never get. i can't lose the money i paid for the dress either. i don't want my shipping money back, i don't want the dress at this point, i just want my money back. damn. i guess i have to chalk it up to a loss altogether. damn dragons. =^..^=

desire

the new manga digital programs out there are pretty good. easy to use and a great way to create and save. my work has gotten better and i'm getting the hand of this program. i'm trying out a few of them so i can see which works better for me, but i digress. a mac top is what i want. so badly. i can use it to store and create my art without having to tie up the home computer and maybe,just maybe i can get my book going. i have so many ideas for books that i'm going to finish one as soon as possible to get working on the next. the problem i have is ocd. everything has to be perfect. at least in my eyes. i know there are people who won't like my work but i don't care. this is my outlet!! this image you see is my first attempt at one digital program. it is fan art, yes, but i have to start somewhere. i haven't quite finished my character designs for my first book but i do have models i am working from. anyhow, this is my latest project, amongst my many others. =^..^=

harold's narration

the narration of harold crick. strange than fiction. my, this film was fairly brilliant. i really enjoyed it. i think i will buy this one. the premise and execution was fabulous. they couldn't have picked better people to play these characters. if you haven't seen it yet i think you should. when i first saw the preview i wasn't too sure about it. i didn't think it was going to be as entertaining as it was and i felt that somehow it resembled the film delirious and that one with rodney dangerfield in it....but to my surprise and delight it was a great watch. the whole movie was captivating and it seemed to be very short. i guess that is a good thing with films as sometimes in the middle i tend to get bored. but this one....i could go on forever. see it. =^..^=

evolution, religion, and the public school system

this country is the greatest. you can believe what you want, practice what you want, say what you want, and be yourself. i think it's wonderful that everyone is allowed to have their own mind. although it upsets me as bit to be viewed as a christian nation. granted there are many christians here and our founding fathers were mostly christian i don't think it's right to involve any sort of godly beliefs in our school system. i think all we should teach our children in the public school system is scientific fact and actually proper, correct history. (that's a completely different post all together.) i don't think it's fair to have someone's religious beliefs pushed on you or to have to sit through these beliefs in school when yours are entirely different. if you want to teach your children creationism and denounce science then you should have your kids home schooled. if you believe that schools should bring god into the equation then you should have your kids home schooled. to deny others beliefs is so very contradictory to christianity. right? to hold on to bigoted ideas about others and their faith the very unchristian. right?
at the street fair one year this woman came up to me and asked if i were christian. i told her no, as i do not practice christian beliefs and my religion has many differences than christianity. she proceeded to tell me that if i were not christian then i could never be saved and would burn in hell. i didn't repsond to her, i just walked away thinking that was not very christian like. why do they do that? they contradict themselves constantly. then try to push their desires and beliefs on others. i just think it should be left out of state and school as our forefathers intended. =^..^=

sickly

i'm sick. i hate being sick. my chest hurts, my head hurts, my sinuses are infected. the girls were sick but not so bad. oh well. i guess i have to be the one to suck it up and take care of everyone. i just want to sleep all day. oh well. being sickly sucks. =^..^=

amatuer

amy you are so talented with the camera. i'm no where near as good as you but here are two i took of sage last year i thought you would be proud of! ;) good job on your newest by the by! =^..^=

scenes from a mall

i'm walking through this mall, always with a destination in mind. there is something i must do, sometimes with more urgency than others. i never get to my destination, however, something always distracts me. this dream comes to me every now and then, for the past few years now. each time there are different people with me and different situations arise to direct my attention to anything other than my purpose. i hope to have closure with this one some day. =^..^=

moving...

it is the time for us to begin the search. we can no longer stand my business to be away from our home so we will be moving to accommodate. it will be nice though as it is easier from home. i'm happy. we're looking around san clemente. there are some really nice houses down there and i'm hoping we can still be fairly close to the ocean. *le sigh...we'll see though. it's a good thing i never unpacked all of our stuff when we moved in here. it will be an easy move. all the movers will have to do is load boxes, furniture, and the piano. i'll box up our clothes and what little we do have out in a day or two! so nice! all my fragiles come with me though. i don't care how good movers say they are, i don't trust anyone to take my treasures! i don't know what i would do if our place was to ever go up in flames, i've gone so far as thinking to put them in a suitcase for that reason alone. i decided against that as i wouldn't be able to enjoy them, thus i run the risk the same as you.
i have to load more pictures and pictures of my latest piece. soon...
i've thought about doing a newer rendition of my high school symbolic self portrait. maybe...=^..^=

art

i wish my art were funky and fresh enough to sell. i wish people were interested in my work. i'm the only one who really likes it, i guess that is all that matters. i wish i could sell it though. i would love to do that someday! *le sigh
=^..^=

funny

i know, it's spamish but my aunt sends me these goofy emails all the time. sometimes they are funny. she just sent one the other day and there were some pretty good quotes. here are a few i enjoyed.
Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually shut the bitch up with cookies.
(Unknown)
The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
-Helen Hayes (at 73)-
Old age ain't no place for sissies .
-Bette Davis-
*****If you can't be a good example -- then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
-Catherine- *****
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.
-Eleanor Roosevelt-
ha ha....the good example one is my favorite!!
it's funny. the quotes you choose tell about your personality!!
=^..^=

deviant

are you deviant yet? do you have a deviant account? you should get one. i use mine strictly for art. no monkey business on my deviant-ness! anyhow, it's a community of artists. it's fun to check out everyone else's talent too. i don't have much up on mine, i'm still working on photographing my art. but soon i will be adding paintings, drawings, sketches, and photography. i like to dip in several places! I would like to check out art.com too. when i do i'll post about it here so you can be in the know! ;) =^..^=

palm trees

I did this one awhile ago. you can't see the color very well because i took the picture with my phone. yesterday i ended up starting another palm tree scene because my mom had a fit that i gave this one to michelle. oh well, now she can have one too. i'll post a better picture of this one and the new one when i finish it. at least i got some of my urge to paint relieved a bit! yay! =^..^=

inspiration fails me

today i feel the need to paint yet totally lack the inspiration. lately i've felt shunned. i don't know why, it's like i have no one on my side. i know amy and kristi are perfect friends i just wish they lived closer so we could actually spend time together. no need to feel bad about it though because i love our talks and can wait until i go visit you or visa versa. i need someone who needs me i suppose. A peak in my psyche was one of the young women on the forum would like to do a letter exchange with me. yay! i'm happy about that. so off to her i will send something special. what could it be? i'm not sure i'll have to see...
my brother says he's coming over today. he has said that for the past few months and then pulled a no call no show. i'm sure he just needs some herb or something....sorry, i can't help him there. maybe i'll garden today. i bought some dahlias and i have some daises to plant too. i'm going to show the girls how to plant seeds and take care of them so they bloom beautiful flowers. they'll like that. =^..^=

midnight treat

full moons are my favorite. i like all phases of the moon but the full moon tugs at me. a few hours must have gone by last night while i was looking at the moon. i was thinking and admiring so much i didn't notice how long i was out there. it started to get cool and i was tired. 65 songs later, 10 cigs short, i finally went to bed. i just can't help myself when the moon is full. i stare. sometimes not one thought crosses my mind. it's like meditation. (i couldn't decide on an image, totally kawaii or my heritage, so i put both up. *giggle) =^..^=

chair unknown

a few years back, wow i guess about 5 or so now, jim, dwight, and scott were moving out of club 309. so over i went to see if i could be of some service. dwight had this totally cool white chair with chrome arm/legs. a new smoking chair!! i was in love. "what are you going to do with that?" i could barely contain myself, slightly jumping up and down. he said he was going to throw it away. i couldn't believe it, it seemed a shame to me that he was going to get rid of a completely bitchin chair. so i picked it up and threw it in my jeep. once i got it to my place it fit perfectly. i sat in the thing every night while i smoked and watched my anime. it was great. well over the years i didn't really take care of it well, not that it was in perfect shape to begin with. it shared a home with 4 bachelors! (dan moved out a year or so before they did.) so it got rusty and the fabric tore. i was sadly to see it so sadly but i didn't have the money to fix it up. dwight even asked me if he could have it back but i called him an indian giver and said no! :}~ well last christmas my parents got it fixed for me. i was so excited. it looks ten times better now then it did when i got it. it's pristine and beautiful. bad ass i must say. i was hoping while it was being fixed up someone would be able to tell me who made it and what year it was made. i have never seen another like it and i can't find any information on it. if anyone knows anything let me know! i would love to read something on it and even see pictures of others! =^..^=

happy birsday

to jim. hopefully he will have a beautifully happy and relaxing day. the girls seem to be in good moods and so far things are nice. he seems happy and relaxed. i like when he is like that. so happy happy birsday from all of me to you i wish it was my birsday so i could party too. (his mom says birsday because she has a korean accent!! so we tease her and giggle) =^..^=

premature ejaculation

my excitement for this item in the last seconds when i swore i would win lead to premature ejaculation. YES, i am still on that damn umbrella. the woman who beat me is very understanding and nice. i pleaded to her explaining my stupidity, ignorance, and misplaced frustration. she was totally cool about it and gave me tips too. i guess now i have to check her thing out to see when she sells that umbrella. if she even sells it. but i don't blame her for not just telling me and letting me send her money when she is ready to rid herself of it, i was a little crazy ass bitchy pants. but it would be nice. i do secretly wish she would receive it and find it not to her taste and immediately want to sell it but the sting isn't so bad today. so enjoy it please and take good care of it because next time it is up for grabs, i'm grabbin'!! i will prevail next time too. :}~ =^..^=

sadly

alright now that i'm calm and collected, not letting my emotions get the best of me, i feel okay about the umbrella. i emailed the woman, via one of her sells, and told her i would pay anything she wanted to get that umbrella. i was short and to the point. she emailed back saying she was sorry and she would keep me in mind if she wants to sell it in the future. i wanted to write back saying i hope the future would be before july but instead i said thank you and that i didn't mean to sound rude i was just completely devastated. also that i hoped she would remember me if she wants to sell it. alright i know i'm the big dummy who should have made my max bet at $250 or something but i didn't think in the very last second i would get swooped on. but apprantly it happens. so, with raw human emotion, i lash my frustrations out on someone else. i can't deny my humanity. mostly positive that i am not the only one who has experienced this in their time of pure, utter devastation, heart break, sorrow. i'm so sadly. i've been moping around the house all night kind of dazed. you may be wondering, "why all this over a silly umbrella?" well i've been searching for the past 3+ years for the perfect umbrella. every one i saw was not for me. then i found this beauty. my name was all over her. but alas she has been snapped from me without even a chance. now i'm at a loss. i don't know what to do. i pine for this that is not mine. but it will pass, i hope. the hurt will be here for a few days at best. then slowly it will fade....right? =^..^=

this bitch!!!

i can't believe it. one second left and this fuckin bitch swooped on my umbrella. i'm so crying right now. i can't believe it. i waited all fuckin day!!!!!!! if you have feedback on your ebay leave her a message that she is a fuckin bitch, alatchka!!! i can't contact her as that was going to be my first purchase. FUCK!!!!!! it's not even fair. I wanted it SOOOO bad. what now? =^..^=

doll

my aunt joyce gave me this beautiful japanese doll. i don't have much information about her and i wish i could find out more about her. she is just beautiful and i treasure her dearly. just wanted to share her as more people need to bask in her beauty! ;)~
=^..^=

soon ending!!!

a jumble of emotions ring throughout my being at this moment. the black parasol auction ends in 2 hours or so. i am currently the highest bidder. i hope and pray and wish please please please let me have this parasol.
now....the yellow one, my gem. the one i desire as badly as the black one. i bid and things were going nice. 5 days until the end. it was only at 20 bucks or so and some little shit came and doubled the bid. so i am now the highest bidder and had to bid 40. grrrr to you. makes me want to ebay stalk and make sure they don't get anything they want. if i only had the time and the crazy. i better get this one.
for some reason i am excited and calm about the black one, the yellow one makes me burn and flail!! goodness...i get flushed.
what do i do???
=^..^=